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Thread: Edicius Ft. Brixton, Nahlidge & Brandon Heat - Casket Closure.

  1. #1
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    Edicius Ft. Brixton, Nahlidge & Brandon Heat - Casket Closure.

    Casket Closure.


    Brixton
    "Store it in a dark place & keep it"..
    .. my secret, was the only deep shit that recognised a weakness.
    Due to sleepless - nights, & tensions tight..
    .. my guilt was kept in check and defeatless.
    A small incident at Christmas, erupted into a mass orgy of loathing,
    bestowing beyond my good intentions to a lesson of hate growing.
    & glowing, illuminous sparks throwing yet more coal onto the fire,
    and the higher it grew, there was no-one who - could make it expire.
    You really think this is a story for hire?
    That once you started reading I'd be greeting you in w/ open arms?
    No queries or quarms? Reveal the reason I actually chose to do harm?
    DO NOT BE FUCKING STUPID.
    That's just a lucid - dream, and it seems that I've already said too much.
    I'd rather hold back the love, and bewilder you with more..
    if I could.
    As for my hands being stained with blood, the rough of a story
    isn't actually what you'd picture it to be.. all brutal & gory.
    See now that would bore me, & if I told you, this tirade would simply be over..
    & I don't want to be the one, who gave myself ..

    Nahlidge
    i hate silent nights, so i`m tryna fight
    my mind, and light the path that i`m tryna ignite
    hear china, think white, but call `em a chink
    fall on the sink, throwin` up, 2 many bottles to drink
    still drinkin`, a bottle a day keeps the problems away
    or is it, a bottle a day to keep the doctor away?
    locked in a cage, slaved, but my spirit runs free
    cried a river, built a bridge, hope the river`ll run clean
    some things, are worth the burden, a select few
    in a money hungry world, that`s waitin` to digest you
    and friends play politics, life`s a game, ur just a part of it
    tryna find love, but you can`t reach the heart of it
    so u swallow it, whole, when ur caught in a hole
    wishin` lucky charms really came with a pot of the gold
    it darkens ur soul, and already a part of it`s sold
    to the highest bidder, unburyin` a garden of cold...hearts

    Brandon Heat
    blame murder on rap, it's harder to cope,
    put suicide on rock... we started them both...
    now... they choke respect, it's harder to claim,
    over came necro, so they gave me it's name...
    so... I move... over, started to think it
    buy a new rover... n' started to sink in...
    my new motor comes in... plus my new motion,
    just pop guns n'... shuck n' jive for em...
    money'll ride for them... fuck you pay me,
    take care of the kid... n' the lights been off lately...
    life's been all crazy, I know it's wrong but,
    either stop cryin now... or I'll shake you to shut up...
    fuck... I'm tired of shit,
    minimum wage... fucked truck... that I'll drive off a cliff...
    it's a shame how... the shit we're prone to,
    is a bitch now... meaning the shit we go through...

    Edicius
    Life .. darkness .. suffering .. pain..
    The only thing i could taste was this repentance
    hidden from the masses with an ecliptic visual sentence
    and this devastation of ultimate doom was apocalyptic
    it was over a done deal as life as entities transcripted..
    sure i tryed to open my eyes in psychological states,
    broke free of my memorys to figure out my own fate..
    but my being was radically distinctive, noone equal
    tears of blood, my heartbeat stopped without a sequel
    with a mind state close to a melancholy depression
    i failed to complete my own session i got inadequate
    & my spirits w/out proper impression
    .. left me dispirited, took a fatal digression
    end of session..resulted in just me alone and my lifeless expression
    these feelings so sad of inadequacy, so despondent
    .. cause my hope flooded away
    screamed for help, yet noone respondent..
    trapped in this big bubble, it will never pop & there is no savior ..
    im just an incubated induvidual trying to conceal
    ..my shortcomings by exaggerating desirable behaviors,
    maybe its a dream or reflection of my own potrayed selection
    .. in search of perfection
    but my thoughts are designed to elude cautious detections..


    .. untill that casket closed.
    Last edited by Edicius; February 10th, 2006 at 10:15 AM

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  2. #2
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    Last edited by Edicius; February 11th, 2006 at 04:16 AM

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  3. #3
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    yes this was brilliantly written might i say...i will feedbakk deep in depth later but right now im in class....expect a response in a few...good work guys

  4. #4
    The League's Bill Parcell
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    ok I was fuckin feelin brixton's shit. so much attitude and flow, beautiful.
    But nahlidge once again had lines that made me fuckin shout out loud...
    these lines were ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh

    fall on the sink, throwin` up, 2 many bottles to drink
    still drinkin`, a bottle a day keeps the problems away
    or is it, a bottle a day to keep the doctor away?
    locked in a cage, slaved, but my spirit runs free
    cried a river, built a bridge, hope the river`ll run clean
    goddamn, he be killin them metaphors...


    money'll ride for them... fuck you pay me,
    take care of the kid... n' the lights been off lately...
    life's been all crazy, I know it's wrong but,
    either stop cryin now... or I'll shake you to shut up...
    crazy shit...

    first part of eddy's was lil too much from me but it really took
    off to A+ range at this part

    sure i tryed to open my eyes in psychological states,
    broke free of my memorys to figure out my own fate..
    but my being was radically distinctive, noone equal
    tears of blood, my heartbeat stopped without a sequel
    with a mind state close to a melancholy depression
    i failed to complete my own session i got inadequate
    & my spirits w/out proper impression
    .. left me dispirited, took a fatal digression
    end of session..resulted in just me alone and my lifeless expression
    I really felt all of that.
    This piece was duckin fope.



    Text (b.2001 - d.2006)
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    Member of A.I.







  5. #5
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    i opened with a speaking poetry than i took an aggresive tour .. thnx for the replys..

    bump

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  6. #6
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    Brixton

    i liked your part because of your use of imagery...dis piece had a lot of substance and you made good use of internals. One line i felt stood out was....

    A small incident at Christmas, erupted into a mass orgy of loathing,
    bestowing beyond my good intentions to a lesson of hate growing.
    & glowing, illuminous sparks throwing yet more coal onto the fire,
    and the higher it grew, there was no-one who - could make it expire


    i like how you used vocab here...nice choice of words....only bad thing i can say about your portion was the structure...but while i was reading i learned to overlook that with your vocab and how you approach your topic...good work 8.5/10

    Nahlidge

    your portion was pretty lyrical and straight forward and that gave a different aspect...as most people would go into depth with enhanced vocab and rhyme schemes...i gave you credit for flow because it was a nice read in my opinoin...

    hate silent nights, so i`m tryna fight
    my mind, and light the path that i`m tryna ignite
    hear china, think white, but call `em a chink


    nice couple of lines here....i sorta laugh at da china white line....good shit...your structure was pretty gudd for da most part ..i give this a 7.5/10

    Edicius

    now u topped out as one of my favorites on RB period with your use of vocab and intelligent topicals...

    The only thing i could taste was this repentance
    hidden from the masses with an ecliptic visual sentence
    and this devastation of ultimate doom was apocalyptic
    it was over a done deal as life as entities transcripted..


    whooaaa...i had to read over this a couple times to fully comprehend..this is years of writing right here ....a few things could've been better like the structure but thats a common thing...nothing more i can say but dis is nicely written..i give it 9/10
    Last edited by ..IllThoughtZ..; February 10th, 2006 at 12:18 PM

  7. #7
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    thnx man, but its like this on teh structure matter.. its about whats inside instead of what it looks like.. IMO, i made the rhyme sheme connected with inner rhyming
    its just cause i hate boxed writing, i can but i wont.

    props on the feed, havent seen this typ a feed in a while.. preciated.

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  8. #8
    is Power Nahlidge's Avatar
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    lol I was gettin` on Eddy about that too. This shit came out dope tho.

    A.i

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  9. #9
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    you niggas are boxed!

    think outside it.. as long as there is flow.. its about the content, you fucking divas ;p

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  10. #10
    The League's Bill Parcell
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    I kinda gotta agree with eddy... what the fuck
    does structure mean, as long as it flows mannn...



    Text (b.2001 - d.2006)
    LLL Season Four: Champion
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  11. #11
    ~~~{ :) E s c's Avatar
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    Wow, this shit made my jaw drop...

    Brixton:

    "Store it in a dark place & keep it"..
    .. my secret, was the only deep shit that recognised a weakness.
    Due to sleepless - nights, & tensions tight..
    .. my guilt was kept in check and defeatless.
    A small incident at Christmas, erupted into a mass orgy of loathing,
    bestowing beyond my good intentions to a lesson of hate growing.
    & glowing, illuminous sparks throwing yet more coal onto the fire,
    and the higher it grew, there was no-one who - could make it expire.
    You really think this is a story for hire?
    Loved these lines... these are the ones that really stood out for me.
    you did well to execute the metas...

    gotta say brix really well done!

    Nah:

    i hate silent nights, so i`m tryna fight
    my mind, and light the path that i`m tryna ignite
    hear china, think white, but call `em a chink
    fall on the sink, throwin` up, 2 many bottles to drink
    still drinkin`, a bottle a day keeps the problems away
    or is it, a bottle a day to keep the doctor away?
    From these your opening lines where absolute fire absolutly loved em
    Really strong secure Rhymeing real nice! . One thing tho, i`m is i'm .isn't it...
    from as far as i've knowen or seen you post its asways been -` lol....oh well just your own style i guess.

    Brandon:

    blame murder on rap, it's harder to cope,
    put suicide on rock... we started them both...
    now... they choke respect, it's harder to claim,
    over came necro, so they gave me it's name...
    Yet again opening lines from you really hot .... These lines REALLY caught my eye i dont know why but they were really nice... Probably just because it hits home quite hard to this site overall your verse was nice not something to shout from mountains about but still comfortable.


    Ed:

    these feelings so sad of inadequacy, so despondent
    .. cause my hope flooded away
    screamed for help, yet noone respondent..
    trapped in this big bubble, it will never pop & there is no savior ..
    im just an incubated induvidual trying to conceal
    ..my shortcomings by exaggerating desirable behaviors,
    maybe its a dream or reflection of my own potrayed selection
    .. in search of perfection
    but my thoughts are designed to elude cautious detections..
    These lines were the best in my opinion the word used were really effective which made this verse stand out by alot this was a nice kind of rhyme sceam which by the looks of things really works for you congrats..

    Well i have to say this whole thing was hot.. and will be nominated for Om hof
    from me... Really nice and well done guys.


    Please leave some feed in the sig.
    Move on , no irony here.

  12. #12
    Luco El Loco
    Guest
    This was very nice.

    Brixton
    came dope as fuck. Those opening lines instantly grabbed my attention. Flow was nice aswel..
    These were dope

    "Store it in a dark place & keep it"..
    .. my secret, was the only deep shit that recognised a weakness.
    Due to sleepless - nights, & tensions tight..
    .. my guilt was kept in check and defeatless.
    A small incident at Christmas, erupted into a mass orgy of loathing,
    bestowing beyond my good intentions to a lesson of hate growing.
    & glowing, illuminous sparks throwing yet more coal onto the fire,
    and the higher it grew, there was no-one who - could make it expire.
    You really think this is a story for hire?

    Nah

    i hate silent nights, so i`m tryna fight
    my mind, and light the path that i`m tryna ignite
    some things, are worth the burden, a select few
    in a money hungry world, that`s waitin` to digest you
    and friends play politics, life`s a game, ur just a part of it
    tryna find love, but you can`t reach the heart of it

    I was really feeling those. World waitin to digest you ws dope.

    Avalon

    I loved this peice. Flow was on point, just flowed off my tongue.
    Suicide on rock line was dope as fuck. Nice peice overall.

    Eddy
    Rhyme scheme was dope. Fucka structure, this flowed perfectly. Imagery and emotion we nice.
    The way you began was unusaul, which made it dope.


    Life .. darkness .. suffering .. pain..
    The only thing i could taste was this repentance
    hidden from the masses with an ecliptic visual sentence
    these feelings so sad of inadequacy, so despondent
    .. cause my hope flooded away
    screamed for help, yet noone respondent..
    trapped in this big bubble, it will never pop & there is no savior ..
    im just an incubated induvidual trying to conceal
    ..my shortcomings by exaggerating desirable behaviors,
    maybe its a dream or reflection of my own potrayed selection
    .. in search of perfection
    but my thoughts are designed to elude cautious detections..

  13. #13
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    ok I was feelin brixton's ish. so much attitude and flow, beautiful.
    But nahlidge once again had lines that made me jump around in glee...
    these lines were ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh

    fall on the sink, throwin` up, 2 many bottles to drink
    still drinkin`, a bottle a day keeps the problems away
    or is it, a bottle a day to keep the doctor away?
    locked in a cage, slaved, but my spirit runs free
    cried a river, built a bridge, hope the river`ll run clean


    goddamn, he killed the metaphors...

    money'll ride for them... fuck you pay me,
    take care of the kid... n' the lights been off lately...
    life's been all crazy, I know it's wrong but,
    either stop cryin now... or I'll shake you to shut up...

    first part was lil too much from me but it really took
    off to illyness range at this part

    sure i tryed to open my eyes in psychological states,
    broke free of my memorys to figure out my own fate..
    but my being was radically distinctive, noone equal
    tears of blood, my heartbeat stopped without a sequel
    with a mind state close to a melancholy depression
    i failed to complete my own session i got inadequate
    & my spirits w/out proper impression
    .. left me dispirited, took a fatal digression
    end of session..resulted in just me alone and my lifeless expression


    I really felt all of that.
    This piece was dope.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mystery~Murdera
    I kinda gotta agree with eddy... what the fuck
    does structure mean, as long as it flows mannn...
    nah structure was aiite 2 this piece i've seen alot WORSE!
    but yeah in them worst cases structure does matter cah it makes it difficult 2 read the goddam thang.. but the structure didn't matter here as it can be well read.. & it is about the flow stil....
    yeah i'll check this out later & leave proper feed on it aiite...1
    ''Crying Is Blackmail''

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Artist.
    ok I was feelin brixton's ish. so much attitude and flow, beautiful.
    But nahlidge once again had lines that made me jump around in glee...
    these lines were ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh

    fall on the sink, throwin` up, 2 many bottles to drink
    still drinkin`, a bottle a day keeps the problems away
    or is it, a bottle a day to keep the doctor away?
    locked in a cage, slaved, but my spirit runs free
    cried a river, built a bridge, hope the river`ll run clean


    goddamn, he killed the metaphors...

    money'll ride for them... fuck you pay me,
    take care of the kid... n' the lights been off lately...
    life's been all crazy, I know it's wrong but,
    either stop cryin now... or I'll shake you to shut up...

    first part was lil too much from me but it really took
    off to illyness range at this part

    sure i tryed to open my eyes in psychological states,
    broke free of my memorys to figure out my own fate..
    but my being was radically distinctive, noone equal
    tears of blood, my heartbeat stopped without a sequel
    with a mind state close to a melancholy depression
    i failed to complete my own session i got inadequate
    & my spirits w/out proper impression
    .. left me dispirited, took a fatal digression
    end of session..resulted in just me alone and my lifeless expression


    I really felt all of that.
    This piece was dope.
    lmfffao.. did i just see that as feed??? lol nah i think u was better off not replyin 2 this at all cah all u've done is copied the first reply on this thread...lol
    ''Crying Is Blackmail''

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